There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize
