On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
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