I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
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