somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Randomize
