what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
