he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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