How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
