**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Randomize
