life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
