Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
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