By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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