You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Randomize
