It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
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