The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
