I think scott just propositioned me for sex
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
