If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
