i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
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