she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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