I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
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