I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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