Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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