You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
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