This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
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