god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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