If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Randomize
