Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
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