But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
