wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
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