dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
