So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
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he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
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Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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