the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
