So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Dating After Heartbreak
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
These Images Prove Chrissy Teigen is the Funniest Model Alive
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.