Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
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I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
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Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.