I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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