when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Randomize
