Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
New Dating App in Dallas For Only The Most Ambitious and Attractive Singles
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Randomize
