You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Randomize