he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
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