Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
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