good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.