also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
