butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize