Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Randomize
