Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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