I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
where are you?
Hypothermia
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize