New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Floor bacon is actually really good
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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