Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
Randomize
