he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Randomize
