I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
