found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Randomize
