I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
My ass is underappreciated
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
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