she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Randomize
