He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
