Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
